Confessions of a Restored Backslider – Part 1

Backsliding is a problem that all believers have faced at one time or another.  There is not one believer (at least not an honest one) I know of who cannot honestly stake claim to the title of “Restored Backslider.” All believers, no matter who you are, should be honest enough to confess that they have found themselves backslidden at one point or another in their Christian walk.  This problem called backsliding, is commonly defined as the returning to our past sinful behaviors or practices in lieu of fully trusting and following Christ is something that haunts every believer.  Once we have committed our lives to Christ we belong in full to Him.  Any variation that leads us away from Christ is Sin.  He saved us in our sin to deliver us from our sin, and backsliding is taking steps to return back to that sin.  It says in a sense that Jesus isn’t enough to satisfy your needs, it is a longing for something more in spite of Him, saying that Jesus is not enough. 

The truth is, we've all failed, we've all back slid, and we have all woken up in a place we did not want to return to, a place we thought that we would never return to.  We awake to an old familiar face in the mirror, one that is facing the day saddened by a return to a sinful state that we thought was finally past.  We stare in the mirror at a face that is now saddened by the loss of joy because of the burden that sin has now applied.  We find ourselves once again standing before God guilty and shameful because we have disgraced our God and Father. 

Questions begin to flood our heart and mind such as, “How did I get here so far and so fast?  How could this have happened?  How could I have gotten so far off track while worshipping and serving Him?  Emotions flood through your heart and mind as you stare at the face in the mirror but which do you address first?  Emotions such as remorse, anger, sadness, bitterness and disgust just to name a few, all of which scream out to be addressed, each wanting attention, none wanting to be released from the list.  It has always been a problem with the people and children of God.  “Why has this people slidden back, Jerusalem, in a perpetual backsliding?  They hold fast to deceit, They refuse to return.” (Jeremiah 8:5 NKJV)

Why is it that so many believers, continue to toy with other gods when we have direct access to the one true God?  Why do we allow the idols of this world to fulfill that which only God Himself can fill?  We dabble with that which we shouldn’t, we listen to the music that the enemy plays and all too soon we are ensnared, we are uncontrollably dancing to the enemies tune, much like a marionettes puppet who dance is controlled by another. 

Another way to picture this is much like sailors found in the tales out of Greek mythology who would succumb to the call of the sirens and end up crashing their ships on the reef to their deaths.  In our lives today, we find that SIN’s call to us is much like that of the alluring call of the sirens in the mythological stories of the ancient Greeks and it is just as dangerous and potentially deadly.  In Greek mythology, sirens were beguiling sea nymphs that troubled sailors.  They would allure male sailors with their seductive voices and their enticing singing.  In many of the mythological texts it is found that that even if you knew better, the song of the sirens were still hard to resist.  In the Odyssey Book XII we find that Odysseus is warned about the dangers he was to face at sea and one of them being Sirens.  Odysseus did not have an Orpheus (Singer of charms) to drown out the lovely voices, so he orders his men to stuff their ears with wax and tie him to a mast.  In doing so the men could sail by in silence while he could hear their song.  The restraints that he had applied kept him from causing any danger to himself, his men or the ship.  It was said that the song of the sirens was so appealing that is hard to resist but that, if heeded,  he would do all that he could to follow their call even to the detriment of his ship and the other men’s lives as well.  So is the same to the call of SIN. 

 

Mythology offered one other escape from their call which was an Orpheus.  An Orpheus was one   whose singing was known to charm all living things.  We find in the adventure of Jason and the Argonauts, that Jason and his men faced the danger of sailing the seas where Sirens were known to be.  Jason and his men survived that passage, sailing safely by but only through the help of the singing of Orpheus.  Though we know that the stories of Jason and the Argonauts along with creatures such as sirens are a myth, we are quite aware of the enemy and the snares that he sets out before us.  As we sail through life and the siren’s calls of the enemy cries out to us there is one that we find today whose voice can over charm the soul and help us against the call to Sin and his name is Jesus.  If we listen to Him we can overcome many of the shipwrecks that sin leads us to; sadly and more often than most will admit we succumb to the call of sin.

All too often we find ourselves playing the part of Odysseus, we are back struggling with in the bondage of sin listening and longing to embrace its alluring seduction.  Life now finds us standing in front of the mirror, shipwrecked on the reef of sin and castaway into the sea being dragged down into the depths as only sin can take us.  Drawn away if you will by our own lusts (James 1:14, “But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed.”) Once enticed we find ourselves quickly separated from the God that we love and who completely loves us.  Standing alone, crying out for sins embrace, and at the same time hoping that those around us cannot hear the call to seduction.  As I mentioned before, backsliding has always been a problem with the people and children of God.  I do not believe that anyone is immune to this struggle with backsliding.

Support for the family in crisis

I had the privilege to sit at the bedside of a dying saint the other day; this dear precious soul had not been able to talk for several days because of her medical condition.  It was quite evident that she could understand what I was saying and more so I knew from her expressions that she was most appreciative of the visit.  I sat there talking to her and her daughter for over a half an hour and during our visit she would nod from time to time as if in agreement and would offer other hand motions to get my attention and try to communicate with us.  Though her spirits appeared to be high there were all the signs of fatigue in her smile, signs that are often seen in those who have experienced more than their share of pain.  Her hands were old and worn but what touched me the most was the weakness of her grip as she held my hand.  She still had a gleam in her eyes but you could also tell that she knew more than she was letting on.  I do believe that she was holding back to stand strong in the presence of her daughter.  This was the first time that I had met this dear saint and I wanted her to know that she was more than just a simple hospital call to me.  It was not long before she began to tire so ended the visit with a moment of prayer.  After leaving her room I was able to spend a few minutes with the family and offered them all the support that anyone can in times like this. 

It was a few short hours later that I was called back to that same saint’s bedside but it was not a joyous reunion, at least not here in the hospital.  She had gone on home to be with the Lord, she had run her race, and she had finished her course and was now at peace and at home with Jesus.  The first thought that came to my mind after entering the room was from the Psalms where David wrote, “Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints.” (Psalm 116:15)  I could clearly see the peace and the love of the Lord in this situation.  This saint was now at home with Him.  As I stood there with the family I began to wonder through the scriptures that I have studied over the years.  I remember that the Apostle Paul said, “…absent from the body and to be present with the Lord.” (2 Cor 5:8)  With that I began to put some thought in line with other passages of Scripture.  If the death of a saint is precious to the Lord (Psalm 116:15) and as the Apostle Paul believed that when absent from the body we’re present with the Lord (2 Cor 5:8) and King Solomon said, “… the spirit will return to God who gave it.” (Ecclesiastes 12:7)  Then perhaps it just might be that Christ Himself is present at their passing and He receives and escorts the passing saint into Glory. 

I sat there with the family for a little while chatting and offering them my sympathy and support in prayer the best I could especially under the present circumstances.  I would share a verse of Scripture and or say a prayer with different members of the family in an effort to help ease the pain and shock of death.  It is truly a blessing to see how the Word of God comforts in times like this.  It is no wonder that one of the most precious passages of Scripture that comforts in times like these also comes from the Psalms.  “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.” (Psalm 23:4)  The comfort of the Lord is present when His saints go home to Him.  There is no need to fear for He is there to help us replace the pain of the experience with hope and assurance because of our faith and trust is in Christ, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment.  But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.” (1 John 4:18)
As I moved around the room talking to the different family members that were there I couldn’t help but notice the difference in the how each family member reacted.  One of them sat there holding the dear saint’s hand and carefully and lovingly continued stroking her arm.  At the same time she was taking in the vision of their family member noticing every blemish, every bruise and every flaw.  Occasionally they would ask me a question about what they observed or just to share a memory that had come to mind.  She would gaze upon the face of her loved one and smile or sigh then she would once again tell me another story or share another memory of this saint.  Another family member sat close to the bedside and held onto herself tightly almost wrapping herself up into a ball.  Every once in a while she would reach out and gently rub the shoulder of this dear saint, let out a deep sigh and then wrap herself back up into a ball  and begin weeping again.  They would join in the conversation from time to time but they were more reserved than the other siblings.  It is our trust in Christ that helps us through times like these because He alone offers HOPE that is needed.  He alone offers us something to hold on to that can and will carry us through the pain.  It is Christ alone that provides the peace that is need to calm the hurting soul.

You could see the signs of fatigue in most of the family members.  The adrenalin that they had been running on over the past several days was finally running out and exhaustion was settling in.  It is amazing how God gives us just what we need when we need it.  It is so evident that God in His gracious and loving care carries us through the rough times as only He can.  Once again I turn to the Psalms to find that which can close out this thought.  Psalm 48:14 says, “For this God is our God forever and ever: he will be our guide even unto death.”